You still shouldn’t drink the water… Review

You still shouldn’t drink the water…

Ok critical game-playing masses, think way back into days of misty yore. Back

to the mid 80’s and the lovable little Atari games that populated those material

times (not to mention the Commodore 64, ColecoVision, Apple II, the original

IBM PC, and the Sega Master System). If you can, think back on one little unfortunately-named

platform-puzzle game called Montezuma’s Revenge.

Remember

it? Probably not unless you are over the age of 22 and are to be commended for

being a long running computer geek

It was a little more intelligent than usual platformer, and the objective

was to go around, solve puzzles, acrobat past obstacles, make some harrowing

jumps, and beat up a few Mayan-ish miscreants. This is the sequel, and it’s

in 3D.

In Montezuma’s Return (the sequel) you play MAX MONTEZUMA! who’s plane

has crashed in some tropical hot spot an is flung into a mysterious cursed Aztec

temple. You control MAX MONTEZUMA! from a 1st person perspective through deepening

levels of the temple, walking around, solving puzzles, acerbating past obstacles,

making some harrowing jumps and other tricky maneuvers, and beating up a few

Mayan-ish miscreants (shame on them).

But in brief, how in the hell do you categorize a game like this? It can only

be described as the first-ever-PC-1st-person-platform-game. The game has you

performing all of the sorts of tasks that you might expect of Mario 3D, but

in 1st-person. Yeah, yeah, that doesn’t sound like so much on paper but the

fact is, you wont find anything else like this on the PC. The closest thing

I can think of are the first-person segments of Shadows

of the Empire
.

The environments in the game are an exercise in artistic conservatism. All

the rooms are very sparsely decorated, almost bland at times, giving a very

surreal feel to the game. The levels and the rooms are created so that the only

architecture is there for either the purpose of a puzzle, a jumping or climbing

feat, or just a neat way to get through an anteroom. You wont find much scenery

here.

This is not a real Mayan temple of any sort, it almost in some ways, a modern

art piece, SOHO! SOHO! However, the graphics in the game in no way fail to please

the eye. Using Utopia’s proprietary Uvision rendering engine, the textures on

the walls are extremely detailed, the environments are unusual and sometimes

very surprising. The character animation is fluid, and there are a lot of those

nifty colored lighting effects that just make your eyes dance the can-can on

the part of your brain that tells your mouth to hang open, your lungs to exhale,

and your tongue and lips to maneuver in such a fashion as to utter a half whispered

“woah, cool.”

In short, you need to have a 3Dfx for this one. Even on my AMD K6-2 3D 300mhz,

the non-accelerated version stuttered madly. The 3Dfx executable, on the other

hand, ran at close to 60 FPS at all times. I’d recommend at least a P166 with

a Voodoo or Voodoo2 card.

Also on the subject of graphics, when you boot up the game it may well surprise

you to be confronted with a low rez vga menu that looks like it was ripped out

of the old Montezuma’s Revenge. Well, yes campers that does mean that this game

is infested with retro! We’ve got retro to the days of Atari: all text, not

just the menus, are funky low rez. The soundtrack is also reminiscent Atari.

And we’ve also got retro back to the days of those quirky 1950’s serials that

produced such characters as The Phantom and other overblown melodramatic jungle

adventurers.

Montezuma himself is the ultimate gung-ho adventurer with a big grin on his

forehead and plenty of power in his trusty knuckles and mighty foot. Which brings

us to combat.

Enemies are sparingly dropped into the game and from time to time you do actually

have to fight them, and of course there’s the ubiquitous Boss at the end of

each level. Note: The enemies in this game are very, very wacky. Your only weapons

are punching and kicking (you never get any real weapons) so combat tends to

be “run at enemy, kick enemy, jump away before enemy can bash your head in,

repeat until enemy shrivels up and disappears.” This isn’t all that bad but

after the first few encounters it does start to get a bit dull.

Fortunately

not all of the bosses must be kicked to death. Killing some of them is more

puzzle-like. For instance, the lavalord hurls lava grenades at you which you

have to punch back in his direction with the right timing so they will explode

in his face before he can punch them away.

The other main flaw with the game besides the lackluster combat is the occasional

frustration level. You start each level with 3 lives and if you loose a life

you warp back to the beginning of the room you were in. The problem is that

there is no save game feature and a lot of the puzzles and jumping tasks can

be very tricky. All to often you find yourself trekking all the way back through

a level just to try and fail yet again to cross that one troublesome lava pit.

This gets harder when you factor in that control is not quite precise, you

slide just a bit after you remove you finger from the key, again, like Shadows

of the Empire
. Also, because you can select any level to play right from

the beginning, the only thing that could make you play the game in order is

the graduated difficulty of the levels. It does make the game feel more unusual

but on the whole it takes away from the feeling of accomplishment that comes

with beating a tough level that you really had to conquer in order to proceed.

Also, since there is no multi-player of any kind, replay value is limited

and you could finish all the game’s 10 levels in about 24 hours. However, the

game does ship with the old Montezuma’s Revenge on the CD which adds

to the play time if you don’t mind stone-age graphics.

Slight annoyances aside this is one of the more original and refreshing games

to grace the PC in a long time. It’s a very well made game that really opens

up a new possibility of what types of games can be made nowadays in snazzy 3D.

At this point we can only sit, play, and wait for the inexorable rush of the

rabid clones. Tune in next time.

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